George Burns Quotes

Found 67 quotes by George Burns .
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George Burns
"I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere."
George Burns
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Age And Aging American Comedian Funny Short Funny Top Funny
George Burns
"The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
George Burns
Acting And Actors American Comedian Funny
George Burns
"[Fein praised Burns as a] singer, dancer, straight man, comedian, and actor who will leave a very large void in our lives. ... to keep doing what he loved best."
George Burns
George Burns
"The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible."
George Burns
American Comedian Beginning Funny
George Burns
"It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth."
George Burns
American Comedian Funny
George Burns
"Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair"
George Burns
Country

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George Burns
"When I was young I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my fifties I was considered eccentric. Here I am doing and saying the same things I did then and I'm labeled senile."
George Burns
George Burns
"I spent a year in that town, one Sunday."
George Burns
Bores And Boredom
George Burns
"If I get big laughs, I'm a comedian. If I get little laughs, I'm a humorist. If I get no laughs, I'm a singer."
George Burns
George Burns
"I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age."
George Burns
Age And Aging American Comedian Funny
George Burns
"How can I die? I'm booked."
George Burns
American Comedian Funny
George Burns
"Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere."
George Burns
Age And Aging American Comedian Funny
George Burns
"I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money."
George Burns
American Comedian Funny Money
George Burns
"Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life."
George Burns
American Comedian Funny Future
George Burns
"I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life."
George Burns
American Comedian Funny Future
George Burns
"I'd rather be a failure at something I enjoyed than be a success at something I hate."
George Burns
Failure
George Burns
"Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair."
George Burns
American Comedian Country Funny
George Burns
"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."
George Burns
American Comedian Caring Funny
George Burns
"People are always asking me when I'm going to retire. Why should I? I've got it two ways -- I'm still making movies, and I'm a senior citizen, so I can see myself at half price."
George Burns
People

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